More than half say meeting a first date at a neutral location is different than when younger, but not everyone opts for quick escapes according to “Tales of the Flipped Ditched & Anxious” and March Forth study. Book and research provide insight about triggering the bad date stopwatch and making the decision whether to dine or dash.
PRLog - Sep. 25, 2014 - CHICAGO -- More than 30% of those over 40 and dating again after divorce or becoming widowed know within 15 minutes whether a date will or won’t work for them.
Men and women are relatively similar when personally assessing the outcome of a date according to Rand Deminc, author of “Tales of the Flipped Ditched & Anxious” and co-director of a national study delving into the social interests and habits of those age 40-plus and dating again.
Overall, one-third know whether a date will work within 15 minutes, including 2% before the start and 4% at first glance. The remaining 27% need another 15 minutes before determining whether, for them, it is va-va-voom or ka-boom.
Almost 51% allow anywhere from 15 minutes to one hour before deciding while 16% take longer.
“Not everyone pre-determining a date is dead before arrival or is toast before the roll basket arrives is necessarily looking for a quick escape, but a large percentage clearly prefer flexibility if needing to click the bad date stopwatch and considering whether to dine or dash,” said Deminc.
Overall, 54% of the participants -- women (63%) and men (42%) -- in the “March Forth Dating Again After 40 Relationship Study” said their choice for meeting a first date at a neutral location was among the major differences when dating now versus when they were younger.
“There are many reasons people realizing there shouldn’t have been a first date or there won’t be a second date still make the best of the experience,” Deminc said.
“Most daters prefer to be out and about looking to sate hungers of various types rather than home alone. Plenty, understanding the value of not burning bridges, don’t want to aggravate their date or the friend, family member or co-worker who may have provided an introduction. Some stick around to test the truth of what they had heard or learned in advance hoping to be surprised,” Deminc added.
Courtesy, the possibility of making a new friend or needing a ride are other often heard reasons.
“The real conflict is when one dater is hearing wedding bells and the other is waiting for a bail out call from a friend,” said Deminc.
Previous released info identifies the trends and tendencies of which daters must be aware, but also supports the message that other than laws that apply to all, there are no absolute dating rules.
* 23.7% began dating before a divorce was final through the first three months of officially becoming single again. Nearly 30% waited from six through eighteen months to date again;
* Slightly more than 30% waited more than two years before making the decision to start dating, if starting at all. Women 65-plus (49%) were most apt to wait two years or longer;
* Online dating sites, social activities and group events, and introductions or fix-ups by family, friends and co-workers are top means for finding dates;
* Of respondents who were married, but separated, 44% started dating right away through the first three months and 72% within one year. Men (87%) started dating within the first year versus women (44%);
* 60% of the participants (68% female, 50% male) admitted using the Internet and background checking websites to research dates;
* 76% of the respondents used texts, emails or websites to socially communicate;
* 41% of the divorced or widowed participants (not in a committed relationship or remarried) started dating then stopped; and
* Of those stopping, 30% met between two and thirty people resulting from online dating and 64% hadn’t tried online dating.
Check www.DitchedAndAnxious.com for more information.
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Date Fate Decided Within 15 Minutes By 33% Over 40 Dating Again After Divorce, Being Widowed
September 25, 2014 at 12:00 PM EDT