With wedding season upon us, a wedding speech expert revealed some tricks and tips for writing the perfect vows for the happy occasion.
Heidi Ellert-McDermott, 46, founder of the United Kingdom-based speech writing company Speechy, said that while many people write their own vows in an attempt at a meaningful gesture on their wedding day, they often make mistakes that can turn a lovely and celebratory situation awkward very fast.
The biggest mistakes to avoid are using "generic clichés" and making the vows far too lengthy, as SWNS, the British news agency, reported.
Before even writing, Ellert-McDermott said couples should make sure they are on the same page when it comes to their vows.
"You have to have a sense of what your partner is doing," she told SWNS.
She said if "one person delivers a funny verse and the other gives quite a long speech proclaiming their love" — this could be "quite an awkward moment" for them.
As long as the couple's overall tone is the same, there are a variety of directions they can take with their vows.
"Some are happy to be a bit cheeky and want their guests smiling — others want to touch everyone's hearts and leave a few people crying," she said.
"Either is fine!"
Ellert-McDrmott strongly recommended avoiding "generic Pinterest quotes," such as, "Nothing made sense until you came into my life," or "You are my soulmate" — which don't make the vows unique for the marrying couple.
Another key thing to remember, she said, is keeping the vows relatively short.
Ellert-McDermott recommended three minutes — or 500 words at a maximum.
Wedding vows should not be a complete retelling of the relationship, she said.
Instead, they should "give a sense of why you were attracted to the other person and how they've made your life more meaningful."
"Then, how you promise to be a good partner to them, and your hopes for the future together," she added.
Vows should be memorized, she also said — and people should never read them straight off a phone during the ceremony.
A growing number of people are seeking out services such as Ellert-McDermott's for their vows, she said.
"There's so many well-established wedding traditions, but delivering your own vows is a relatively recent phenomenon, so there isn't really a template for it," she noted.
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Most of all, Ellert-McDermott urged couples to be "genuinely unique" when writing their vows or getting assistance with their vows.
"The variety of vows we have produced are as varied as couples are," she said.
"Ultimately, whatever you're doing, it's a celebration of a couple’s love, and it's getting your friends and families there to be part of that and support you," she said.
