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Gen Z TikToker defends being child-free, says having kids can also be selfish: 'I love my selfish life'

A social media influencer has amassed a large following by touting her choice to not have children, and shares videos from stressed parents who have chosen to do so.

Abigail Porter, a 24-year-old social media personality, defended living her child-free lifestyle and argued that having children can be just as selfish a choice as not having them.

Young people opting out of parenthood have been taking to TikTok to celebrate the joys of child-free living. The acronym "DINK," meaning "dual income, no kids," refers to married couples or partners in a committed relationship who remain childless by choice for reasons like lifestyle preferences, personal freedom and financial savings.

Porter is one example of a child-free member of Gen Z who appears to have made an entire social media niche about her life plan without offspring. Videos on her TikTok page range from content such as "Top Ten Reasons Not to Have Kids 2023" to multiple "Free Birth Control" videos showcasing parents sharing gross or stressful parenting moments on TikTok. 

She also posts videos showing herself traveling and experiencing daily life, portraying how happy one can be without offspring.

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"People have always been up in arms about whether or not the decision I have made not to have children is a selfish one," she said in a recent video picked up by news outlets. "But here’s the thing, I do believe that I have made a selfish choice, and I love my selfish life, and I wouldn’t change it for the world."

She went on to say that there are people who think that "having a kid automatically absolves you of all selfishness and that you can no longer be a selfish person, and I just don’t believe that that is true."

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She then argued that the act of parenting may involve self-sacrifice, but choosing to have kids is often made for one’s own happiness.

"We also have to distinguish between the decision to have a child and also the act of parenting, because I think that’s where people get confused. The act of parenting requires so much self-sacrifice," she said. "When people decide to have kids, they are deciding to do so out of a desire for self-fulfillment, or maybe curiosity or boredom or baby fever. They’re choosing to have that child so that they can have the experience of being a parent."

"Selfish reasons to have kids aren’t necessarily bad reasons to have kids, but they are selfish ones," she concluded.

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